In the middle of summer holidays and trying to occupy two tweenies in a small country town, this post from www.cuppacocoa.com, “A Better Way to Say I’m Sorry” literally jumped at me out of my Facebook feed.   I‘ve heard so many insincere apologies and they are frustrating. I’m sure they make things worse between my two younger peeps.

Jay 10, and Gracie 12, have been annoying each other since school finished. They do things to annoy each other and react to things the other does.  Things like not moving out of the way when the other wants to get cutlery out of the drawer, pushing the other off the jetty into the river, making those quiet little comments that irritate … the list goes on and on.   And always at the end, the insincere apology. Argggghhh!

So now armed with a formula I wait like a mother lioness ready to pounce. The perfect moment doesn’t take long and I start the “perfect way to apologise” script. The immediate reaction was stunned silence from both as I insisted Jay repeat it after me.   All was going well until we got to “Will you forgive me?” to which Gracie responded with a big fat “NO”. Bedlam, yelling all over again. Once Jay calmed down, I quietly explained to Gracie that we would be doing this every time they fight and asked her if that is what she would like to hear when she asked for forgiveness. Silence.

It wasn’t long and I had another opportunity to use the script. Jay again has to repeat after me and finally we get to “Will you forgive me?” Gracie looks at him with those dark calculating eyes and I can tell she is weighing up her response. Which way will she go? Will this work? Has this question been powerful enough? And to my surprise “Yeah sure” is what I heard. This proud mummy lioness wanted to do a happy dance, shout and roar with pride.  Happy Days!

I’m learning to celebrate the small wins. What small wins are you celebrating today?

Enjoy your day.

Cheers,

Hope.